i blow and blow yes
till my face is all blue
squeaking and squawking
on my new kazoo!

so shiny and red
with some blue and black
with matching helmet
in case of attack!

play on the sidewalk
a medley of tunes
then duck and cover
from rocks and balloons

tomatoes, onions
parsnips don't you know?
could make a salad
with things that they throw!

but i heed them not
i skip down the street
quacking my kazoo
padding head to feet!

play an old show tune
for granny mcgrump
she claims she'll kill me
my body she'll dump

down in the river
in big cement shoes
i'll change my tune then
be playing the blues!

play for the mailman
hits me with his sack
i kick his fat butt
a way to get back!

he chases me down
the street and them some
i blow a loud shriek
for help...i ain't dumb!

then round the corner
a pack of mad mutts
come barking boldly
full of doggie guts!

they see the mailman
and tear off his pants
he blushes beet red
does a retreat dance!

i watch him run yes
pink undies and all
letters all flying
like leaves in the fall!

i take my kazoo
press it to my lips
blow out a ditty
and swivel my hips!

i skip and i hop
on my merry way
lived to play kazoo
yet another day!

and...

i blow and blow yes
till my face is all blue
squeaking and squawking
on my new kazoo!