alien life forms, above
the sea of boiling creation and repeptition forming underneath them
they nod their heads and agree with my self-loathing
i step back to allow to forward and to grasp backwards to for my
because you hold hers and want to let me feel let in
i loved you, once, but now i avoid the reaching digits
that span and spawn backwards, wiggling
the aliens turn and face us, the full light of their eyes falling into mine
and i am lifted above you with a new conviction that even the air-conditioning cannot wash out of my bones
she has solved herself for your ilk, but i will fix myself for no-one
a scar on my leg reminds me of where i have gone
but words falling of my hot, hot, searing copper tongue remind me what i brought back
i will not sell my soul for comfort with my machine,
i will not protitute my light for you or for anyone
the aliens turn away from me again,
face down to look at the wet wet man who no longer means anything to me
beautiful as the music is that rolls off his metal strings,
his words are mercury, smooth and poisonnous
their heads, bowed, the aliens are silent and dark
no more answers to my questions will be found in their illuminating lights
no more questions raised by my answrs will be instigated as they are silent
and the sand is ground beneath my feet, i will scorn you all to laugh
even as, in the dark, lips catch jaws and breaths are caught
i have known it for the tip of a knife before losing it again to the sea
i will not sell my light for anyone anymore, and i will not fake it
i succumb my smoke and mirrors to truth and the ugliness it entails
entrails, so dark and matted that they are no-longer real, will never be mine
i am not so broken that i need to be fixed
i will never fix myself, for you or for anyone
i need you not.