What’s in a name?

“It’s a pleasure to meet you Aunt Billy”
as she patted me on my head.
Now I am not one to be a know it all,
but I sures do know “Billy” ain’t
no name for a woman.

Aunt Billy and Uncle Alley
lived a stones throw from
Grandma’s house. I mean
I could hit their red brick house with a rock.
Uncle Alley was a carpenter, mighty fine one at that.
But just like all his brothers, he was missin fingers.
Thank the Lord he wasn’t no Doctor.

I always thought it a bit peculiar that Grandma and Aunt Billy
needed a squawk box between the two houses.
Comes to find out the county line ran smack
between the houses and it was “long distance”
talk, and talk they did.
There were times I’d walk by the kitchen
I’d swear, cross my heart hope to die,
stick a-needle-in–my-eye,
that there was cackling hens
laying eggs complaining about
the rooster in the room.

I sure would catch a woopin
if Grandma heard me call her that
but I calls it likes I hears it.
Ya see my Grandpa married into
three main families round here,
Crimes, Passmore’s and Love.
Aunt Billy and Grandma were
from the Love side of the family tree.
that’s the side with the names.

Must have been something in the food they was
eating or drinking, they sure got the men and the women
folk callin all mixed up. I bout split a gut when I learned
Grandma’s name, Wallace Gregory Love,
christian named at birth.
Grandma came from 13 brothers and sisters,
Grandpa from 12,
To top it all off my daddy is an only child, aint that a hoot?

Edwards weren’t much better with name pickin,
That’s my family name, weez all over these parts too.
My Grandpa’s name was James Harvey!
My Grandpa’s brother name was James Lafayette!!
My Daddy’s name is James Harvey!!!
Makes me think they stayed out in the sun to long
before the name pickin commenced.

Well when I heard all this,
and my head stopped spinnin
I said to myself when I gets older I sure is
goin to name my kids good original names.
Oh yeah that guy Johnny Cash, if he was my pappy
I’d be upset to with a name like Sue ,
“How do you do” my foot …

Copyright © 2008 Ronald J. Edwards