CaN I sAy a fEw wORds
Ok,I have some more shit
I need to get off my chest.
Thoughts are kind of all over the
place,but i'll try to do my best.
So,here we are again,where we
say goodbye and "move on".
You say its because of the poem,
and lately I've been so withdrawn.
Made up your mind and all,and
now you're feeling a certain way.
Can you blame me for backing off,
after all the games you've played.
How many times has it been,that
I've thrown myself at your feet.
How many times has it been that
my love had to take a backseat.
Some times you make it seem
like you don't really care.
Friends say you do,but you love me
so much that it makes you scared.
Scared because you love me,but
don't think I can live up to my word.
So you shut me out out of fear,and
all things prior that has occured.
It could be,but i'd be fooling myself
in believing that any of that's true.
But,it would explain much of the
things that you often say and do.
Stability,baby daddy,being afraid,
it all leads me to the same place.
Yet yesterday,you had a hard time
looking at me straight in the face.
You call the next morning,I'd
say about nine or ten o'clock.
I ask what did you call to say,
but what do I get,"oh,I forgot".
So,what does it mean,is it that
you're hiding what you feel.
Could it be you do love me,yet
choose to keep it concealed.
When we talk you shut down for some
reason,so I make my own assumptions.
Mind wanders,coming to conclusions which
makes me look foolish in my presumptions.
I'm feeling so many things right now,
but anger the predominate emotion.
Angry at myself,for following
my heart with such devotion.
It hasn't been easy for me,
putting myself on display.
You knowing my feelings,thoughts and
everyone reading what I have to say.
Neocon has me pegged as a masturbating
stalker,but I keep telling him it isn't true.
You'll have to post a comment to convince him otherwise,even if its the last thing that you do.
I've written so many poems about you
that I think I'm running out of rhymes.
It would be easy to give up,if I didn't feel
your soul some how connects to mine.
If you haven't read Chasing Wanda before,
this will be the third time that I've lost her.
I don't know if anyone reading watches
Friends,but I want Wanda to be my lobster.
Look,I know I wrote some stuff,but
It was really all out of frustration.
Like how can I walk away from one
of Gods most beautifulest creations.
If you're reading,I know you're smiling
right now,even if you don't want to.
That's why you don't want to let me
go,I have that awesome effect on you.
But it is what it is,just know that I love
you,and I will always feel this way.
Thanks for reading this far,but
for now its all I have to say.
-
- ricklovin's blog
- Login or register to post comments
- 751 reads
Hi Rick
If I were her, I'd give up and fall into your arms...right now!
nice write, again!
Linda:)
lol thanks
Thanks Linda...let's hope she does one day.ill be waiting!!!
Ricklovin
honesty
This is a good vent, and seems full of open honesty. But I hope the things you wrote about her "Look,I know I wrote some stuff,but
It was really all out of frustration". Weren't written in public, its one thing to say and do something to them, but another when its put on display for others. Women, or at least most girls I know, hate stuff like that. Best wishes to you.
i know
I know what you mean,but what I wrote wasn't bad at all..but,she is super sensitive and takes things a certain way..I would never write anything bad about her...even if I were super mad,I love the girl to much to hurt her like that...if you read the poem in ? Fed up with it all,that's the poem I was speaking of,you'll see it wasn't to bad...there's a lot more,all are found under chasing wanda,there's like 20 or so of them lol..thanks for reading and taking the time to comment,and also for the insight on women lol,its all well apreciated Ricklovin
scarlet,think youre right
The comment you left made me think a lot last night,so I read the poem over,and maybe I was a bit harsh towards the end..I guess you're right..I was thinking of taking that one down,but its already been read,damage done so to speak...and it did put a wedge in between us...we spoke for a while last night but I can tell it bothers her some...its all your fault,where were you when I was writing it huh,lol j\k...but in my defense...I was really mad and frustrated,I could've written worse but didn't...believe it or not I chose my words carefully,taking her feelings under consideration even while upset..it may not come off that way,but I tried to convey what anger I felt at that moment without hurting her but yet still get my point across..which isn't easy,I may seem like a sweetheart to some,but I've been known to be a real asshole at times...she's never seen that side of me cause I'm not that guy anymore...he's there somewhere,but when it comes to her he's dead and buried..anyway,I really went off here didn't I lol,sorry to bother...later
Ricklovin
Well I wish you both luck
Well I wish you both luck either way. I'm not trying to judge you, I don't know you. ;) But I did want to put one thought up. Women like attention right? But when people put up appology poems, is it because they want to prove their sorry, or becuase their looking from attention.
This is gonna come off wrong. Umm. What I'm trying to say is prove this poem is ment for her by making it less public. All the attention goes to her and is shared with no one else. This in its own way proves your sincerity.
I hope that wasn't to confusing. Again best wishes.
its all good
Scarlet,trust me,I apreciate the comments,lord knows us men need all the help we can get when it comes to women lol...but,I post it here cause I know she reads...now I don't do it for the attention,even if its nice to hear what I've written is good or bad or what not..its just she has such a hard time sharing her feelings,and shuts down when I try to share mines so I'm really left with no other option...its either tell my story here or keep it to myself and then she'll never know how I really feel and what I honestly think...you do make a very good point tho..I can see how making it more personal would make it even more real,but she won't give me that chance...so what do I do?
Ricklovin
The answer to that is the
The answer to that is the one men hate hearing the most. *deep breath* step back and give her room to decide if she wants you there or not. And if you can't do that you walk away. Sucky answer I know :( I'm sorry
damn scarlet
Your right I didn't want to hear that...if I do that I'm sure she won't want me...I don't want to but maybe I have to face it huh..anyway,thanks for taking the time ok...apreciate it...Ricklovin
this is a great write
but I have to tell you I feel a real connection with your girl. I don't know the circumstances, but maybe they are like mine. Which makes it so hard to trust or give love freely. It is easy to say let the past go, but it is a hell of a lot harder than most know. I also wanted to say I agree with Scarlet, it breaks my heart every time Ron posts another poem letting the world know how horrible I am. I just want to scream out to every reply that tell him how great he is and how selfish I must be, you only know one side of the story. Then I want to ask him if I am so bad why are you still here? I didn't read anything bad that you wrote about her though, I think you are very much in love. Be patient with her, and remember sometimes it is not the words that work for you, but the actions.
Sorry for the rant, but you just happened to be the lucky one.
Your work is beautiful and I hope it works out for you.
Total abstinence is so excellent a thing that it cannot be carried to too great an extent. In my passion for it I even carry it so far as to totally abstain from total abstinence itself.
Mark Twain June 11, 1881
holy crap
Beth I had no idea those poems were of you...and you're right,mines is the one side of the story as is rons...but I can't sum it up for you...when she and I met,I was the other man...I quickly fell in love but knew it wouldn't last...she fell for me to but saw something that wasn't at all what it seemed..lol I know how it sounds but its true lol...k,she saw me coming out the shower in my towel and my brothers "female friend" was there right when she walked in and she jumped to conclusions...so after that it all went to hell..a year later I find her again,we start up again but Its like she doesn't believe anything I say,since I'm good with words and all...says I'm just talking,so,I start to show her but she was with someone else...I waited,and waited...again we start up but it was short lived,and we ended up staying friends...and here we are...she's been thru quite a lot in her life that makes her be a certain way,which I completely understand and sympathize with...now there's something else to the story,it has to do with where I find myself in life at this point...at a young age I was a rebel,liked doing this my own way..and its all caught up with me,now I'm in no positon to really do anything for her...I mean I take care of my bills and my kids but I can only do so much...so in a way I don't blame her,I mean love can get you only so far right..she has a kid to and wants to be happy and be able to live a good life,and you can't live on love alone right..and shes been thru so much she desevers to be happy,I just want to be the one does does it for her! I know I comfort her and make her feel good and loved but there's a lot more to life than just love..I'm taking the steps to better my situation,but its gonna take some time...so,now you know somewhat of the other side of the story...now,the question is,are you going to share yours? Ricklovin
Beth
Not every poem, every vent everything I say is about you. The negativity I live with daily has been there long before you and I got together. Rick, great poem! Sometimes they just don't understand. And they say "we" don't listen~Ron
*"whenever in doubt, dream...inspiration will happen when you least expect it.." r/k 2-2009
http://members.tripod.com/Ron_Kinard
ummm
Thanks Ron...f*&k,I know I'm not to blame but I feel like I started some shit here...please tell me I'm wrong...and Ron,honestly,I think we hear them,but rarely ever really listen!!! Ricklovin
Not your fault
even though you'll get blamed for it as I usually do. Hell, I take the blame before the question even arises. I listen more than I'm given credit for. It's not our fault they change what they mean in mid stride, how are we supposed to know which way to turn unless they pull the reins BEFORE the turn instead of waiting until it's long past, having to turn around and back up. It's a wonder I have a sane brain cell left. It takes two to tango, but we are the inadequate ones even though we have two heads (better than one, right?). Besides they rule, they got half the money and all the "kitty", what more can I say?~Ron
*"whenever in doubt, dream...inspiration will happen when you least expect it.." r/k 2-2009
http://members.tripod.com/Ron_Kinard
lmao
Sorry for laughing but your response was funny..and its true,they want us to read between the lines when they can just come out and say whatever it is right..like we're mind readers or something...I can see her point too tho...fuck why does it have to be so hard huh...anyway,I apologize to you both,wether I was to blame or not...thanks for being so understanding Ron.
Ricklovin
Great write
Wow...it sounds so familiar. Good write sounds like it came from the heart.
Busarider
always from the heart!
Maybe that's cause I've written this same poem over and over again lmao...or it seems like it sometimes! Thanks for the read and comment.
Ricklovin
So much I want to say...
I just hope it all works out for you, this is another good write from the heart,best wishes, later-Lee
its a nice one.. hope
its a nice one.. hope everything wokrs out for you!
**Gitanjali**
thanks alot
Thank you,I hope it all works out to,thanks for the read and the comment.
Ricklovin
There's no ones elses
There's no ones elses opinion I value more on this subject than yours...I know what some might say Lee,I should let go...I want to and don't at the same time...its like this is the person I want,and I'm willing to do whatever it takes to get her,point blank...besides,its like smoking weed,I haven't stopped cause I'm not a quitter lol j\k...Lee honestly I think its because I'm not the type of person that can live with what ifs...when I do get her,cause I will,and if it does or doesn't work out,then at least ill know either way...and isn't something worth having worth fighting for,at least that's the bull they feed us right lol..its been a while now I know,and there's so many obsticles in the way but I'm working on some of those things,it might take me anothe r three years,and life may lead us in different directions,but we always seem to come back to each other,I'm counting on that!!! Thanks for the read Lee!
Ricklovin
Thank you Rick
for valuing my opinion so much. But may I say this, no one person has all the answers, especially me. I think Scarlet brings up very good points to look at. I think giving her some room is not a bad idea, maybe you need a break from it too, it doesn't mean your giving up. When emotions get this highly charged it can cloud your thinking. I also do think you need a way of venting too. I want to say more but I think it would be better in a email. You know the best advice may come from a women who is centered in her life right now, and maybe a bit older.... hmmm... Linda? OK, Don't tell her I said she is old,lol.
I just think of all the people, if I needed advice , especially from a women's pov, I would ask Linda. And by the way, I didn't know about Ron and Beth, I hope they can find all the right answers too, I think a lot of both of them. Later-Lee
true
But I have given her space,she always comes back...and when I chose to take some for myself she felt I was pulling away...she recently wanted to try but I was seeing someone this time,I told her I would if since she didn't want me,she said fine like she didn't care so I did...shit I don't know...to me no one has the right answers when it comes to love..every relationship is different and has its own dynamics and problems and soforth...now,lol about the Linda comment,you're on ya own on that one buddy lol. Ricklovin
Rick
Sorry I called you a masturbating stalker; I was only playing. If anything, I'm the biggest masturbating freak on this site. And I really do hope you find happiness with the right chick. You're a good dude; any girl would lucky to have you. Peace, my friend.
dude
I know you were joking,I just added that to lighten up the piece a little lol...thanks for reading and for the well wishes,I really apreciate it!!! Hey did you see the Bill Mahr with Ron Howard and Gore Vidal,it was pretty interesting..he changed the format a bit for that show but it was still pretty good.
Ricklovin
Nah
I haven't seen it yet. I'll probably stream it online later this week. This season's been pretty good so far.
Wanda riing!
If she does not want you Rick... I'll taake you! I'll be your Lobster!
But if we do ... You can't go off Wanda riing!
Ray AKA Yobarney
yo-barney
What's up bro,how's that novel coming along? Dude,you had to go there huh lol.
It's coming bro! Ray AKA
It's coming bro!
Ray AKA Yobarney
..
..