Please help me I'm falling,
and I can't get up.
The grease on the floor
spilled out of my cup.

Measuring canola
shouldn't be that hard,
but the lid was stuck
on my jar of lard.

To substitute some oil
seemed the way to go;
it’s a healthy choice
with an easy flow.

Well, that cup full of oil
in my firmest grasp
flew up in the air
when you made me gasp.

I just want you to know
I'm a skittish soul,
and you sure scared me
with that big ski pole.

I thought you were outside,
and I was alone,
when you poked my rear
and let out a moan.

With my feet in the air
and oil on the floor,
you might as well do
want you came in for.