I remember waking up
not sure what to call it
Didn't have a word for it yet
They said it was Park Forest

Illinois, that is

screamed
rubbed my eyes
flailed about
screamed some more
tried to get up and run

I shit my pants instead

no mom, get that nasty thing away from my face
no that never happened
I was bottle fed

tried to go back to sleep
tried to wake up somewhere else

I kept crying and crying
and said No God
Please not this one
Don't do this to me

Daddy's an Insurance Agent
Mommy's a Jesus Freak
Shortly before I showed up
They thought themselves
Hippies

Last thing I remember
The sirens came
Zipped up tight
Black blanket
Pronounced dead

1:53 pm
It was a Wednesday
first of september

Cause of death dammit?
I can't remember
Where?
I don't know

It was 1973
it wasn't Christmas
But everything was white

The disco ball just stopped spinning
I saw a white light
Actually it was the toilet

Crack!

said my head

Ouch!

Then I saw red

Angels in leisure suits

spiraling columns of white light

from the depth of their souls

i heard a sound

from speakers in the soles of their white shoes

they snapped one time

then burst into song

"white lines
And headlights in my eyes
White lines
I'm ready to drive all night
White lines
How many 'till I'm in your arms
White lines
Will bring me home"

Where am I?
am I on the davenport?
And what's that playin
on the Hi-Fi?

That song came out in 1983 stupid
That never happened

the year was 1973

saw a bright light
golden staircase
the works
hovered around
as butterflies
and whispered the world goodbye

in less than an hour I was back
sent by sling shot
made of sticks and rubber bands
didn't weigh much
only 21 grams

whirling stars
cosmic dust
a big lake

whoa that's a big building

Yes, my child they call it the Sears Tower

cool. did you make that ?

Uhhh

Kind of.......

God, please

don't do this to me

I've been good

But you've also been very bad

What on Earth do you mean?

You'll find out

Don't worry, I'll send you somewhere nice

(shhh pssttt, since you're one of my favorites I can't help but love the shit out of you white people. you're so evil but so cute when you get fat. I'll send you to my favorite country in the whole world. no matter how much you suffer, there will always be snacks)

The four seasons?

No, but I promise they'll be a pool

214 Ash Street
Park Forest Illinois
60466
they called it the Co-ops

stumbled around in a stubby little body
i stood up, i laughed
fell down and cried
then i shit my pants

Hey God are you there?

This thing you gave me doesn't work very well

who put all this tacky crap everywhere?

I said excuse me god what the fuck is this shit

and I wouldn't call that kiddie piece of plastic a pool

the pools will get nicer
maybe i'll throw in a jacuzzi
for now be patient

for you are precious my child
don't want you to drown
If you come back too soon
I'll send you back down

You've got a lot of work to do missy

What? McDonalds headset?
grocery cart brown bag cash register
kmart blue light
polo uniform shirt
all the colors of the rainbow
white button down shirt
black pants black shoes bottle of house wine
corporate clip on tie
pepper grinder
spilt plates angry people
And plenty of perverts
blacklight night club
strobe light spot light
red and white stripes
suspenders glittering with flair

khaki pants up to your tits

And the Lord said:
May she wear braces
that smile will bring sunshine
to hungry wanderers

Jeez..
coulda made em' straight
in the first place

I said

"But God
i thought
the sun shines
from the other end..."

he said, "SHUT UP
NOT EVERYONE
DESERVES A JOB"

and

"there are other places you know
You can lay naked in the dirt
hungry and covered in flies"

He then slapped me and said, "You best get out on that streetcorner and start workin' it. Come back with some money and I'll give you a sandwich or somethin.' You God's ho now. Bitch"

You've got a lot of work to do
You better get crackin'

If you're good
A pair of wings
you can learn
how to fly

Oh come on God

that's not funny

those crappy tickets are standby

you can't drown just yet

you know what would be really funny

how bout you try to walk through life

in a pair of cement shoes

THUNDEROUS

HA HA HA HA

Just kidding said God

I'm not that much of a dick

have some orange floaties
swimming lessons
at the public pool
they called it the Aqua Center

are you kidding me god?

that's digusting

GO NOW MY CHILD
GO NOW BURN IN HELL
Go now

Sonora Desert
Arizona
Chihuahua Desert
New Mexico

Let everything be prickly
Make it all with jagged edges

As a warning of things to come
I'll set the furnace at almost
unbearable

(cuz you're one of my favorites, i'll throw in a swamp cooler. it won't work when it's humid. you're on your own with the electric bill.....)

Let there be rattlessnakes

giant pigs with sharp teeth
watch out for the Gila monster
Scorpions in your cheerio's
cennipedes in your bed
flying roaches
flying saucers

area 51

or

at least something called a palomino beetle

dare you to walk barefoot, god said

i said

since you're here why don't you make some water to walk on

There you are my child

Enjoy the pool

Why God?

WHHHYYYY?!!!!

For you have been good
but not that good
consider yourself lucky

Not everyone in hell has a swimming pool

2:37 pm
i meet the folks
St James Hospital
Chicago Heights,
Illinois

Took one look at those people
started screaming