I’m lost and confused
It’s as if someone else is controlling
My body.
Leading me
Causing me to relapse
Relapse down a path that
I can’t come to believe exist.
Relapse down a path that
Could potentially get worse.
Relapse down a path that will
Potentially lead to death
MY DEATH

I now understand
Why people turn to drugs.

But I can’t let them in
My blood.
So I’m stuck in the relapse
Draining my own blood.
Taking control
Of what’s going on.

I’ve now found
A clear mind
Learning that I had control
Of my body THE whole time.
I just made the mistake
Of giving you the chance to lead me.
Lead me right over the edge
Of relapse.
Causing me to fall.
But while I was down
Under it all.
I ran into a friend that
Helps solve it all.
It glistens in the sun
A nice silver blade

A razor blade
That puts all control
Back in my hands.
With this simple small thing
I decide when & where I scar
Whether I live or die.
So with this control in my
Hands
I take just one more thought
& write you a note.

“Sorry I was
Never good enough.
Please
Just know I tried the
Best I could.”

So you were the last one
On my mind as I died.
As I took that blade
And slit both wrist.
My crimson blood
All pouring out.
Showing I HAVE CONTROL!
But with each drop
And each breath
I grow farther &
Farther Away from life this day.
But with my last breath
I let out one last tear
As I cry
WHY?!?!
For the very last time
As I die.

Hmmm...
I guess I was just running
Away the whole time.