I try to smile,but my lips refuse to stretch
my face is like a marionette's.
butchershops and cabarets

It's all the same in the end.

Wrinkles,I got older only in two weeks
the color of my hair is wearing out.
yellow shade on my cheeks.
voice dry,I cannot shout.

Darkest circles around my eyes
no sleep for me,no sleep at all.
beating wings of noisy flies
on my skin as I crawl.

Sickness,truly heavy woe
wretched body so frail
still I cannot let go
I'm destined to fail.

I am a living corpse
smell of decay
creeps from sealed doors.

By wednesday I'll know
if I'll be released or
if I'll have to suffer slow.

Oh,Rain.
I hate the sun when I cannot see it.
Oh,pain...

Out of the window the world is beautiful
blue sky,perfect,heaven on earth.
I cannot enjoy it,not because I'm a fool
but because on wednesday I might meet my death.

I'm trying to save myself
but the effort is so exhausting and never enough,
It tests my mental health,
but if I succeed I'll be able to dream again and laugh.

By wednesday noon I'll know what to do
and divide fake from true.

Dear god,I lit a candle in your home
there'll be more for my triumph or more for my funeral.
guide me don't let me roam.

Until then pray for my success
I wish not more neither less.