CHoices

a poem about choices
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When I was lifted high on the “ish”
The shit to speak
The tweak
I intellectualized it
To enhance my already overblown
Senses

You asked why I quit
So here is the gist of it
put succinctly into this poem:

My reasons why are the same reasons
I used to ask myself why not?
And conveniently decided not to remember
Or strategically forgot
About the causality
The casual irresponsibility
And its relation to plausible consequence

Hence
I suffered great loss and incomprehensible demoralization
A hopped up
Candy flipping male slut
King of the sour mash and Coke
And over the counter Kola Nut
Focused way to much
Dry throat
narrowed in
On
The cactus brain and his evil grin
Made to order
On Ma Huang Stem

Are you seeing my point?

It was Lysurgic Acidosis
Though it doesn’t clarify the mind
When the mind is razed
To fill to the brim
And
White Willow
Increases the need and
In well creased wool slacks
Pinpoints the appeal of those
who will bite pillows
and offer up girly gifts from the sacred middle
within

There is no starlight for this masquerade ball
Under Bolivia’s veil
Made slick with propylene glycol,
A crystalline coping measure
And an almost tireless gasping purposed haul
Deplorable demeanor
On methamphetaminal water’s sail
Debased
Dark and drenched in decadence
Tossed and churned by Gomorrah like gales

A tawdry tale?
Indeed
Coke
Tweak
X
Or any form of speed
Made worse by depravity and insatiable need
And a bottle of Herraduras
And a z-trip of weed
I almost died
I almost died trying to get to heaven
And after a ride with a 5150
On June 7th
I made the choice to say
What I should have said when I smoked goodbye
To childhood at the young age of 11

No
A thousand times no
and yes to myself

©J.K. Bradford