Pretending

I put my make up on,
Concealing all my imperfections.
I straighten my hair,
Ironing out all the kinks.
I put perfume on,
Masking the bad.
I put pretty clothes on,
Hiding who I am.
I smile big,
Pretending to be happy.
I laugh at jokes,
That I don’t think are funny.
I listen to music,
That I don’t really like.
I study hard,
So people don’t say I’m dumb.
I try my hardest,
For everyone’s approval.
I try my best
At everything I do.
But when I get home,
I just can’t take it.
I freak out,
and everything just comes loose.
I am stressed,
And unhappy,
But no one really knows.
I just wish things were better.
I wish I didn’t have to grow up.
I want to be young again,
I want to be tough.
I am not who I am,
I am not who you see,
I am someone who just wants to be.