What am I doing here?
I should be at home
The reasons for self exploration
Have fallen on deaf ears
Exposed as a vicious fraud
No one can take the experience away
But this bitterness remains
I should have stayed in my place...

I'm the recluse in the bathtub
Full of flies and roaches
Smoking the endless cigarette
Tossing the butts into the sink
Ashes covering my face
Watching a continuous loop of porn
While slavishly catering to the demons
In my head
Serenity indeed...

I don't want to take anything precious
I'm unable to give a damn thing
Except this heavy heart
And a face inscrutable
Cue emotions where there is none
The damage has been done
I've paid the freight and it
Ain't getting any easier
But If I don't move
Only you know what's gonna happen
Next...

P-2009