Poignant Portrait
Startled…twas I pulled up short
Taken aback by melancholy eyes
The visage in the portrait tore
My sight in deep surprise
A wistful smile purveyed in lambent oil
A silent plea her image comprised
“Please remain, a meager moment’s toil
Allow me your attentions…let us both surmise”
I…in momentary transfixion held
By mysterious confliction of canvas and eye
The “fixed in forever” person within
That but for a moment had come alive
The magic moment slowly ceased to persist
Our gaze slowly broken
As fades the fog,…the morning mist
We communed, tho’ had ne’er spoken
Her request, unspoken , writ upon my back
As I moved to the portrait next
In quiescent plea, pled “remain with me”
I yet perceive her tacit text
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- David O Whalen's blog
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Very Nice
David,
This was very well done. Very good writing. I enjoyed it thoroughly...
ahh how I love art. You are a stunning writer.
Thank you for sharing
Sincerely
Britishkid16
Just you and I...
David o Whalen methinks perhaps only just you and I
will care to praise this poem on high
for very few else care for archaic words
everyone else thinks they're for the birds
(except just you and I)
Thanks BritKid for giving me your time.
I appreciate your appreciation... of my archaic rhyme
Nice eye candy, David
I like this one. Visiting a gallery or museum, could it be the
portrait or a woman. Wonderful imagination.
An aside, what's up with this site? It's running weird.
raskin
Weird is putting it mildly....
David o Whalen It's easy to waste an awful lot of time out of one's life trying to navigate to and around this site. I think this site's servers (whatever a server is) are out of date, and hopefully they're updating everything. Today I had to come in the back door by googling myself and then clicking on me. Don't laugh, It worked! I'm pretty sure this site originates from France and that in itself might explain it all! Have you ever seen a great French car? There's a lot of other sites out there, but most poets seem reluctant (or afraid) to try something new. I post on four different sites myself. Poemhunter.com has ten times the number of poets, has a top 500 most popular poets list (updated daily) Speaking of weird, have you noticed the recently popular list has mostly poems 1 to 4 yrs old? I counted the other day, and out of the 40 poems on the first two pages only 4....four for crying out loud were from this year!! What gives, and how do these old poems get reposted so often. Some are good indeed, but most are ordinary. I read one of the ordinary ones out of curiousity the other day that had gotten like 150 to 200 hits in just a day or two. I checked the total hits and it had 32,000 hits and counting! It was from 2008, but even at that it had to have been read at least 4 times by every poet on this site! Blankin' unbelievable! Another gripe I have is poems making the other "recently popular list" by virtue not whether the poem is good or not, but by the fact that it gets 3 comments! I could put "f*&k in the title of everyone of my poems and make the list without breaking a sweat or make it blasphemous or controversial. Piece of cake, Right? I hope your ears aren't ragged Raz, but it was your fault, you got me started!! Oh yeah, thanks for reading me and you probably, (for better or worse) put me on that recently popular (not!) list.
Wordsmith
David you have written a lovely piece of work here, the language you use to express your thoughts is very visual, you have painted a picture in my head.
Keep up the creativity, the world needs people like you!
Tom
Oliver Twist...
David o Whalen was my inspiration for this bit of fluff. I tried to make it as Dickensenian as I could. Thought it might be a bit too flowery and archaic for most of today's readers, but I think it's fun to write in a ornate, affected, ol' fashioned way. At least it's kinda poetic! Thanks Tom for appreciating my hard (5 minutes over coffee) labor, and giving me a bit of your time.