I miss her complaining
Makes me cry in my beer
I’m so miserable without her
It’s as if she’s still here

My pickup and coon dog 'Ol' Blue'
Give me a lil’ bit of cheer
And my ma getting out of state prison
and my gittin' stinkin', from drinkin' more beer

Catchin’ some catfish
Makes me wish she were near
To gut em' and to fry em'
all battered up in more beer

I miss her cute lil’ fuzzy mustache
It hides the wart on her chin
I miss that piercing high voice
Tho’ it did get under my skin

miss the smell of her foot fungus powder
Miss havin’ her bringin' me more beer
Yeah, I’m so miserable without her
It’s almost as if she’s still here

my dirty shorts and socks can just lay there
But Dang! I hate getting’ my own beer
Yeah, I'm so dang miserable without her
it's almost as if she's still here

so there's one thing to me
that's become crystal clear
and it's that I've gotta teach...
'ol' Blue' to fetch my beer

And there's one more thing
that'd help me miss her less so
and that'd be to teach 'ol' Blue'
to play the 5 string banjo.

Yeah, I'm so dang miserable without her
feelin so empty and low
Hey! I just heard a squirrel
Gotta get my gun (and a beer)
gotta go!